Schmidt Family Trivia 2008: The Results

This Christmas Eve, the Schmidt siblings and extended family had occasion to demonstrate their knowledge of each other and various Schmidt family facts in Trivia 2008. Thank you all for your help contributing questions and memories. I had a great time putting the game together. Maybe it was the fact that we were spread out a bit this year, maybe it was my yearning to reminisce in the wake of turning 40, or maybe I was just looking for something for us to do other than eat.

Congratulations go out to SFT winner Jen, who was essentially playing alone from a remote Atlanta location. With no ability to overhear the hushed responses from mom, or glean some knowledge from the faces of her competitors, Jen narrowly edged brother Jim 49 pts to 48 pts. to claim victory.

Initially, I thought it was Jim who took top honors, but upon further review, an error was spotted in his ordering of mom's siblings. I think he had Uncle Ron and Uncle Herb reversed. (My answer key was wrong on that one, sorry Jim) As a result of this two-point mistake, Jim dropped from 50 to 48 points, sealing Jen's win.

Here are the rest of the results:

41 points for Darryl
38 points for Kate
37 points for Claire
24 points for Dad
20 points for Donn
14 points for Teri
13 points for Jim Sommerville
11 points for Kathy
6 points for Michael

Claire's impressive score begs the question, how in god's name did she know this stuff??? Especially without the Cliff's Notes and study guide the rest of us had, i.e. mom. That Ph.D is no fluke, Claire!

Clearly age and wisdom did not go hand in hand in the case of Dad. What happened old man? You lived through this stuff, for chrissakes. Dad's pitiful result in SFT was mirrored in the Spreadsheet NFL football pool for this past season. Have you at least been able to defeat mom in cribbage after dinner? I expect better in 2009.

Thanks for the comments and suggestions for next year. Expect a challenging set of questions with a new wrinkle or two. Happy New Year, all y'all.

Littering in the News

Teen who put bra on antenna faces litter charge

Undergarment ultimately flew off, led to accident in which 2 men were hurt

TOLEDO, Ohio - A teenager who put her bra on a car antenna before it flew off and led to a highway accident will be charged with littering, a prosecutor said.

Emily Davis, 17, of Bowling Green, told investigators she took her bra off while her friend was driving on Interstate 75.

James Campbell, who was driving behind the girls, said he swerved to avoid the bra and his car flipped several times. Campbell, 37, broke a vertebra in his neck during the Sept. 26 accident. His passenger, Jeff Long, 40, broke several ribs.

Man accused of laundry littering

A man was charged in 3rd District Court on Tuesday for dumping the contents of a well-used cat box into a washing machine containing another man's clothes earlier this month.

The 49-year-old man told police he performed the act "in spite" of the other man after his wet laundry was removed from a commercial washer at a South Salt Lake laundromat. Court documents state the other man removed the clothing so he could wash his own clothes. He told police the wash cycle was finished.

The used cat litter caused nearly $600 in damages to the washer and destroyed the man's clothes, according to court documents.

The 49-year-old man was charged with two misdemeanor counts of criminal mischief and a warrant was issued for his arrest.

Katherine Heigl Caught Littering

Katherine Heigl is a litterbug.

After lunching with her mom at P.F. Chang's in Santa Monica recently, the actress had to sweet-talk her way out of a ticket for tossing her cigarette on the ground right in front of a policeman on a bike.

"The officer told Katherine to pick up the butt and throw it away in the trash, 10 feet away," the source says. "He added that he'd fine her next time he catches her tossing trash on the sidewalk."

And to think, I spent hard-earned money to rent "Knocked Up"

Chris Wins Mamacita's Bowl 2008

My three-person college football pool, Mamacita's Bowl, ended earlier this month, but for all intents and purposes, it was over for Jim Schmidt and Mark C. sometime shortly after Halloween. As the winner, I'll be treated to dinner anywhere in Asheville and needless to say I will be going deep into the drinks and apps menus.

We picked 5 college games each week against the spread. Each win was worth a fictional $100. Final standings are as follows:

1st Place: BROTHER CHRIS (3-2 wk15; 50-25 overall, +$2500)

2nd Place: JIMBO (4-1 wk15; 39-36 overall, +$300)
3rd Place: MARK C. (5-0 wk15; 34-41 overall, -$700)

That's not a misprint my friends. 50-25! And yes, I've been wondering why I didn't place real money on these picks. It's a record not likely to be matched.

Picking college games against the spread this season changed the way I watched football. First of all, who won and who lost was of little relevance. Of course, it was all about the spread, who covered, who was likely to score another 11 points in the final 8 minutes of a game. An otherwise meaningless missed extra point, a mop-up TD, or a coach deciding to "take a knee" in the final seconds could become the defining moment of a game I had picked.

Against the Spread Rankings-- (Thanks Vegas Insider!)

ATS RANKINGS

Straight-Up Against The Spread Over/Under Team Total Home Away Total Home Away Total Home Away Air Force 8-4 3-3 5-1 10-4-0 3-2-0 7-2-0 5-4-0 4-1-0 1-3-0 Akron 5-7 1-4 4-3 6-6-0 2-3-0 4-3-0 3-1-0 2-0-0 1-1-0 Alabama 12-0 7-0 5-0 9-3-0 4-3-0 5-0-0 3-6-0 0-3-0 3-3-0 Alabama-Birmingham 4-8 2-3 2-5 6-4-1 2-1-1 4-3-0 3-4-0 1-2-0 2-2-0 Arizona State 5-6 4-3 1-3 4-5-1 2-4-0 2-1-1 4-5-0 3-2-0 2-2-0 Arizona 6-5 4-2 2-3 5-5-1 4-1-1 1-4-0 3-7-0 1-3-0 2-2-0 Arkansas 5-7 3-3 2-4 6-4-1 3-2-0 3-2-1 4-3-0 2-2-0 2-1-0 Arkansas State 6-5 4-1 2-4 3-7-0 2-2-0 1-5-0 1-1-0 0-0-0 1-1-0 Army 3-8 2-4 1-4 6-4-0 2-3-0 4-1-0 2-4-0 1-3-0 1-1-0 Auburn 5-7 4-3 1-4 2-9-0 2-4-0 0-5-0 2-5-0 1-1-0 1-4-0 Ball State 12-0 6-0 6-0 9-2-0 4-1-0 5-1-0

I've always been a fan of the college game, but getting involved in Mamacita's Bowl transformed my interest in Saturday football. For example, I found myself engrossed in Duke football on more than one occasion. I came to feel I truly understood the play of the last remaining independents, namely Army, Navy, and Notre Dame. On a week I picked a high score "under" watching, say Rice, Tulsa, or anyone in the Big 12 play defense became a gut-wrenching experience. Doesn't anyone wrap up anymore?

Unlike Jim and Mark C. who usually took points as a rule, I tried to find some balance in my five college picks each week. I liked at least one over/under game, one 'large spread' game, and a mixture of big and small conference games.

At the beginning of the season, I felt it was important to remain free of emotion or team loyalty when picking games. Stone-cold reason, statistics, and logic should rule each decision. That certainly didn't last. My fascination with Troy and teams in ESPN's Bottom Ten, as well as my skepticism of the Scott Van Pelt theory of always taking points resulted in some ill-advised choices come Saturday. And while my success (two 5-0 weeks!) bred confidence in each subsequent week's picks, it was really mostly about luck.
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Thanks again to Jim and Mark for inviting me to participate in Mamacita's Bowl this year and thanks to my sports-hating wife for listening to me ramble on about the minutia of the whole affair. Now, will it be Scratch, Table, or Cucina 24?

Emery Goes Pee on the Potty!

For a few months now, Emery's been climbing up on his Elmo Potty Seat, assuring us he was ready to pee like mama and dada. While none of these attempts led to a successful tinkle, we've been so proud of the boy for happily giving it the ol' college try, at the same time figuring he's just readying himself for actually going one day soon. Then, just a few days ago, there he was, back on Elmo, and this time we finally heard the blessed sound!

Needless to say, we're all pretty thrilled here, most of all Emery. It was exciting to see him up there, proud of himself, yet giggling uncontrollably. (Like when he farts in the tub) He couldn't wait to go again! And he has, each day this week. So it looks like we've started down the path towards diaper liberation.

A couple of stickers and cookies later, we were making plans to call grandparents, and share the news with Ms. Ryan and Ms. Liz, Em's teachers. After Emery went to bed, I went out to empty the car from that afternoon's trip to Target, which included two giant boxes of #6 diapers. The path's a slow one.

some toonz for yoose

A Teachable Moment

This past week, one of our 6th grade teacher teams (all female) asked me to speak to one of their boys. (our guidance counselor, Mike, was out sick today and they needed a male teacher, fast)

It seems this young feller has been, how do I say this, 'er, "enjoying himself a bit too much" in class, even after repeated appeals to stop. Ah, it seems mother nature is a powerful force! Well, I told my colleagues I would be happy to help. I have to say it was a teaching situation I hadn't encountered in 12 years on the job, and being an expert, 'er I mean, "somewhat knowledgeable" in the area, felt I might be able to offer the boy some advice.

To say the least it was an interesting conversation. With no time to prepare I just decided we'd put the cards right on the table as they say. (It should be noted that, while being introduced to the young man, I chose NOT to shake his hand) After some general talk about the normalcy of bodily changes and some chatting about how some things are best in a certain "time and place" I asked him if he had any more to say. He told me he understood why this might be a problem in school but proceeded to tell me that there are times when he's the only person left on the bus and he's "sure" the bus driver can't seem him. "Mr. S, is that like being alone? What about that place?" The Kids are Alright, I thought.

I liked playing the role of counselor for a change. I figure it's good practice for me considering my own son will be a pre-teen one of these days.

Later that afternoon, my principal informed me that our counselor Mike, had just spoken to this boy a few days earlier and, yet, the young fellow was back to it today which is why they came to me. Having been a middle school teacher and counselor herself for many years, my principal Debbie, was resigned to the fact that this behavior might be a tough thing to correct, jokingly adding "we might just have to get the boy a beach towel."

What I Picked Up Today

Since buying our house in Asheville 5 years ago, I've been picking up litter along our road about once a month. Although the amount of trash along this 3 block stretch that winds down to the French Broad River Park has diminished substantially in that time, it just never seems to go away completely.

Our neighborhood is generally pretty quiet. However, Riverview is unfortunately a "cut through" road between the heavily commercial areas of Biltmore Village and Haywood Road in West Asheville. Therefore, particularly on weekend nights, we get a host of yokels and teenage wannabees driving up and down Riverview who, having just paid a visit to one of the many drive through windows or gas stations along the Biltmore Ave/Hendersonville Road corridor, decide to make our road the place to deposit their waste.

Thanks to fine folks who, each morning, drive to suburban office parks and spend their days in cubicles mining data and doing advanced, targeted market research for their corporate overseers, it's not too difficult to create a "profile" of the typical litterer, based of course on all the shit I pick up each month. So, what follows is an analysis of one month's Riverview Dr. trash, picked up on July 22nd and broken down by category, followed by composite "sketch" of the offenders. It amounted to one completely filled 30 gallon garbage bag.

Alcohol: Pabst 4o oz. bottle (in paper bag), Schlitz Malt Liquor 40 oz. can (in paper bag), Natural Ice 40 oz. can, Miller 40 oz. can, Coors Light 12 oz. can, Budwiser 40 oz. can, and some shit called Tilt Malt Liquor in a 12 oz. can. (It should be noted that in all my years of picking up litter, I've never picked up a can or bottle of beer from a microbrewery. i.e. Highland, Sweetwater, etc.)
"Mike" age 34 from Leicester. A prolific litterer from his Chevy truck despite having only one arm.

Soft Drinks: Sierra Mist 20 oz. bottle, Mountain Dew 12 oz. can, Faygo Pineapple Orange 20 oz. bottle, a gallon jug of sweet tea (a first!) three 12 oz. cans of Dr. Pepper, Gatorade 12 oz. bottle, two cans of Sprite, four cans of Pepsi, three large fountain cups of Pepsi, four fountain beverages from various fast food places.
"Ramon and Brian" aged 8 from Candler. As of yet, there is no direct correlation between fountain beverage consumption and childhood obesity.

Fast Food: various bags, wrappers, boxes, cups, and containers from the following franchises: McDonalds, Wendys, Bojangles, Zaxbys, Burger King, Sonic, and Krispy Kreme donuts.
"Donnell" age 18 from Asheville. An alternate on the Asheville High Debate team, he makes frequent trips down Riverview Dr. on his way to Biltomore Forest to read aloud to his Nana.

"Gas Station" items: Microwave dinner box (sesame chicken), one M + M's wrapper, Peanut Butter bars wrapper, two plastic cups (the kind you see at college parties), two generic fountain beverage cups (at least 64 oz.)

The items listed above amounted to about two-thirds of the garbage picked up that day. The remaining third could be only categorized as random shit. For example, things like paper plates, straws, a hubcap, pens, newspaper, plastic bags, etc.

They Heart NY

I recently came across these two PSA's urging New York City residents to keep their fair city litter free. Having such contrasting styles, it's fun to watch them side by side. The first was made by director, David Lynch. The second, from 1971, used longtime Yankee player and broadcaster, Bobby Murcer. (who passed away today)


FDE's fave David Lynch movies...Mulholland Dr. and The Straight Story, (so very non-Lynchian and hey, what can I say, I'm from Wisconsin)
FDE's fave David Lynch regular...Harry Dean Stanton
FDE's fave line from a Lynch movie...Lula (Laura Dern) to Sailor (Nick Cage) in Wild at Heart, "You got me hotter than Georgia asphalt."



Murcer, who hit .277 over his 17 year career, with 252 jacks, never really lived up to the hype that surrounded him upon his entry into the Yankee organization. He's probably best known for his moving eulogy at the funeral for teammate Thurman Munson. Just hours after the Munson funeral, Murcer was suited up for a game against the Orioles. With the Yankees down 4-0, Murcer hit a three run homer in the 7th and then delivered a two-run single in the 9th to give the Yanks the win. Murcer gave the bat from that game to the widow of Munson, to honor his former teammate.

Bobby Murcer's other Babe Ruth moment was known as the "Scott Crull" game. On August 8, 1977, Murcer promised to try and hit a home run and a double for terminally ill fan Scott Crull who he had spoken to by phone. That night, against the Pittsburgh Pirates, Murcer hit two home runs. Broadcasting the game nationally on ABC, Keith Jackson told the country how Murcer had fulfilled the dying boy’s last wish. However, no one had told the young man he was dying. Murcer, however, denied he made an outright promise to Crull, as ABC had reported during the game.

Scott's mother told the AP, "It's wonderful that he got to talk to one of the players, and by Murcer hitting the home runs...he was thrilled." The AP later reported comments from Kenneth Crull, the young boy's uncle said "Bobby Murcer did a wonderful thing for Scotty . . . it was the highlight of his whole life." Linda Crull, the boy's aunt added, "What Bobby Murcer did was great. But what happened afterward we'd just as soon forget about." ABC's Jackson had relayed the story that had been told to him by a Chicago Cub official Buck Peden and alerted the boy to his own medical condition. Three weeks later, On August 22, Crull died. Ten hours later the Cubs beat the Giants 3-2 at Wrigley Field and Murcer hit his 24th home run. At that point the Cubs' record was 70-53, and they were 7-1/2 games out, in 2nd place. The Cubs slumped and finished at .500 with and 81-81 record. The homer in the "Scott Crull" game was one of 5 game-winning home runs Murcer had in 1977.

Get Out of the Car and Grab a Bag

If you drive on I26, in and around Asheville, NC, with any frequency, you've probably noticed the inmate crews along the side of the highway filling the bright orange bags with all the shit people are too lazy to dispose of themselves. As much as I hate the assholes who, for some reason, can't wait until they get home to dispose of a Big Mac wrapper or a can of soda, having cons work the roadsides seems to me to be a more charitable gift back to society than say, taking in the day's Bold and the Beautiful episode back in the joint.


Frequently motoring past scenes like the one pictured above, however, got me thinking... there's a problem here. Sure, there's the trooper or DOC guy standing guard over the chain gang, gun in one hand. But why isn't there a garbage bag in the other? With the problem of roadside debris seemingly only getting worse, couldn't we make better use of our various uniformed, otherwise idle, lawmen? Everyday I see two or three squad cars parked along Haywood Road in West Asheville, garbage strewn about around them. What about walking the beat, bag in hand? My guess is, if Mr. John Law had to pick up trash, we'd see a whole lot less flying out of car windows.

The Wire: Baltimore, Trash, and Natural Police

At the moment, I am completely absorbed in David Simon's HBO drama, The Wire. Having just finished the first season, it no doubt ranks as some of the best television I've ever seen. Simon takes us deep into Body-more, Murdaland, far beyond Camden Yards and the city's famed crab houses. In Season One, Mc Nulty, Daniels, Greggs, Freamon, and the rest of the mismatched BPD crew work the drug-ridden West Baltimore low rises, hoping to get some shit on the seemingly untouchable kingpin, Avon Barksdale.

Having lived in Baltimore for four years, I have an added interest in the show, especially in its depiction of the city I once called home. I can attest to the fact that, despite Baltimore's many charms, it is a filthy sewer. For Simon, part of the narrative comes out of this portrayal of his city. The Wire frames its shots carefully. In the foreground, while we see block after block of boarded up row houses, overgrown vacant lots filled with old furniture, and garbage strewn about everywhere; there, in that same shot, is the gleaming skyline and Inner Harbor beyond. Such contrasting worlds, just a mile or so apart. Simon heightens the level of frustration we feel for these overwhelmed cops with scenes of detectives searching, post- crime, for any scrap of evidence amidst a decaying, urban war zone. As the camera pans the ground in front of Bunk and McNulty on some vacant lot, viewers ask themselves, "How in the hell do they find anything in that shithole?"

A little later in the season, however, Simon cleverly alters our view of the littered streets. After Greggs "takes two for the company" in an undercover bust gone bad, the crew sets out looking for the shooters. Freamon and Prez use the wire to track a call put in to "Stringer" Bell (the brains behind the Barksdale empire) from a pay phone in northwest 20 minutes or so after the shooting. The prints on the phone are no good, but there, in the street near the phone, is a crumpled can of orange Slice (the same can we saw "Little Man," a Barksdale underling, thoughtlessly toss to the ground after calling Bell in a previous scene). It's bagged and dusted, and the search is on for Greggs' shooter.

Simon forces viewers of the Wire to attend to the details. The act of littering, so common a deed in the projects that we shouldn't even notice it, becomes a key event later in the episode. And who thinks to inspect a can laying in the street? Freamon, of course, he's 'natural police'.

When There Were Four Channels

People of a certain age will remember when Public Service Announcements (PSA's) were an integral part of the tv viewing experience. With only four channels, no remote control, and a regulated television industry, parents and their kids were offered a reprieve from the usual rhythm of content and ads in the form of engaging socially responsible messages. For up to 60 seconds (imagine!) PSA's told us about the dangers of smoking, reminded us that we, in fact, could prevent forest fires, and revealed to us how pollution of all sorts was pissing off both the natural world and the descendants of our land's first inhabitants. Those "Indian" PSA's, for me, were exceptionally memorable. I hate litter, and I think my memories of the crying Indian are one factor as to why this is true.